Monsters
by skulldilocks
Summary: While Tessa struggles with her feelings for Will and Jem, women in London are brutally slain. As the body count rises, Tessa can't help but feel the murders are somehow connect to Mortmain and her own confusing heritage.
1. Chapter 1

So here is an updated version of Chapter One. Thank you so much to Pyreflies Painter for helping me with the find the character names and for pointing out some pretty grievous spelling mistakes on my part. I hope it didn't distract anyone from the material too much. I'm so happy that everyone is enjoying the story. Like I said before, this is my first FF and you guys are so great that you make me want to write 100 more.

Monsters

Tessa Gray thought she could never, sincerely, hate anyone; until today. She stalked through the institute wallowing in her new found hatred of him, so engrossed in her anger that, for the first time in weeks, she couldn't find the door to her own room. When she finally stumbled upon her door, after five minutes of rage induced searching, she wrenched it open with all the force her training with the Lightwoods had given her and slammed it shut with the loudest bang she could muster. She flung herself on her bed, mindless of all the buttons and straps of her dress and the pins in her hair digging painfully into her scalp, and tried as hard as she could to keep her mind off of this morning's events. _Jem_ she thought to herself, _you must remember Jem, if he sees you in such a state he will suspect something_. He would surely be at her door in a matter of seconds after hearing the brutal force she enacted upon it. But, his knock never came. So she allowed herself to think of this morning, while the rage she so helplessly tried to leave behind boiled.

She had woken in an unusually pleasant mood this morning. She hadn't had many enjoyable mornings since her brother's death, and Will's confession. Dreams that she couldn't exactly remember, but knew were of both Nate and Will, haunted her sleeping hours and she often woke disgruntled. But, last night she slept in dreamless bliss. After ensuring that both her hair and dress were in proper order, she journeyed downstairs for breakfast. It was still quite early, so she was the first to take her seat at the table Sophie had so beautifully set. _She must get up hours before the sun_, Tessa thought fondly as she admired how absolutely perfect the institute looked, even though Sophie was the only maid in the largest institute in England. _I'll have to thank her more _she said to herself before her thoughts were interrupted by the second breakfast attendant. As Cecily entered the room Tessa froze.

Since the announcement of her engagement to Jem, Will had treated Tessa with far more coldness then ever before. He would rarely speak to her, and when he did he would throw out more hurtful remarks than Tessa thought possible. This contempt did not go unnoticed by the rest of the institute. Jem had frequently come to her defense, and Charlotte had even gone so far as to kick Will out of the institute one night after a particularly horrible remark about fornicating with Downworlders aimed directly at Tessa. Although Cecily seemed sweet and kind for the first few days she spent at the institute, she wanted nothing more than her brother's acceptance. This need for approval led Cecily to treat Tessa almost as horribly as Will. Although Cecily's remarks hurt far less than her brother's, Tessa did not look forward to spending the next half an hour alone with the girl.

"You're awake early," Cecily said in a scathingly sweet tone as she took her seat across the table. Her shockingly blue eyes, which were identically to Will's, mocked Tessa with every glance. "I would have thought you wanted to get as much beauty rest as possible."

Tessa would not let this remark get to her; she had heard far worse. "I slept very well Miss Herondale, thank you for your concern," Tessa said in a most lady-like manner. Cecily smirked with her perfectly bow shaped mouth and rolled her eyes in the opposite direction. The two girls sat in listening to Bridget singing, waiting for Sophie to deliver breakfast. "Angels that noise is annoying" Cecily said to no one unparticular.

"Well we all have to deal with things we can't stand" Tessa said very pointedly. This remark only served to lengthen Cecily's smirk. Just then, Sophie bustled through the dinning room carry a veritable feast.

"Here you go madams, Bridget was feeling exceptionally cheerful today and prepared a very special breakfast." Sophie said smiling at the two girls. Tessa thought back to the conversation she had with Sophie a few weeks prior concerning Bridget, her new roommate, and thought that maybe Sophie was warming up to the new cook. Although with the way Bridget was singing in the kitchen Tessa never would have thought she was having a good day.

"Thank you Sophie. This looks delectable." Tessa said eyeing a particularly moist looking berry scone.

"Now Tessa, you don't want to attack the food," said Cecily in an unbelievably sweet voice. "With the way you've been eating lately, you'll never fit into a corset for the wedding." Sophie turned to glare at the girl, while Tessa did her best to ignore the jab and grabbed a two berry scones just to prove to Cecily that she was unfazed.

The door to the dinning room began to open, and Tess prayed that it was Jem, or Charlotte anyone but –

"Will, there you are! I was beginning to worry that I was going to have to spend breakfast alone" Cecily said, ignoring the little sound of indignation that Tessa let escape. Even though he had treated her like dirt as of late, Will still had the same effect as always on Tessa. The moment he walked in the door her stomach began to flutter and her heart to beat faster. Recently he had stopped shaving and the newly grown stubble on his face gave the impression that he was much older than Seventeen. Tessa thought that this new rugged look suited him, although she did enjoy how smooth Jem's face was against her own when he stole a kiss. While Will did look quite handsome, Tessa also noticed that his eyes were rimmed with red, as if he had stayed up all night, and his skin seemed tinged with gray. Cecily stood from her chair to kiss him on the cheek as he gave a passing glance to Tessa. He didn't say a word to her. He took his seat next to his sister and chose one of the berry scones and poured himself some tea. "So, sister, how is your training?" he asked before taking sip of tea.

"It's going fantastically well" Cecily replied smiling "Gideon says I'm doing remarkably compared to his other students." Sophie, who was busy putting even more food on the table, stopped short gave the girl a glare that Tessa thought would frighten Mortmain. Although Tessa was not certain, she believed that Gideon was still pursuing Sophie, but he had paid much more attention to Cecily during training, presumably because she was new. However, Sophie's uncomfortable manner when Gideon placed his arms around the younger girl to show her a move did not go unnoticed by Tessa.

"Well, that's not much to compare to," Will said passively "And you're a Herondale, of course you are going to out-perform everyone." Although she would never say it out loud, Tessa also wondered if the Herondale's out-performed others gambling and alcohol addictions as well. It was no secret that Cecily had left her parent's house because her father had relapsed into his harmful addictions, which continued to tear the family apart. As Cecily explained to Charlotte and the rest of the institute, after Cecily confronted Ragnor Fell about Will's well being, she told her father of the encounter, who spent years attempting to repress the fact that one of his daughters was dead and his son had abandoned his family. That very day he left for the night and gambled away everything the Herondale's had saved since he had quit two years prior.

"Indeed," Cecily agreed. "I'm sure it's because our bloodline is completely pure. Not one Herondale has ever mated with a human." She said smirking at Tessa.

"Honestly, I'm disgusted that any respectable Shadowhunter would stoop so low as to mate with something entirely pathetic." Will agreed.

"At least it's better than a Downworlder" said Cecily and she began buttering her toast. "Just thinking about some having . . . relations with a Downworlder makes me cringe.'

"I'm not entirely sure why the Council ever made hunting Downwolders illegal," Will said in a pompous voice "they're a complete mockery of life. We hunt demons don't we? Why not half demons?"

Tessa couldn't hold back any longer; Will had just demonstrated an intolerable level of hypocrisy, "How can you say such a thing!" Tessa said on the verge of shouting, "You have relied on Downworlders far more than any other Shadowhunter at the institute. If it wasn't for a Downworlder, you wouldn't . . ." _He wouldn't what? He wouldn't have been able to confess his love for her, only to have his hopes dashed against the rocks?_ She couldn't say that to him, she didn't want to hurt him, and if the almost pleading look he was giving her said anything she didn't think he had told Cecily the whole story. "We wouldn't have been able to get information about Mortmain. If you haven't forgotten, it was Magnus Bane who helped us escape from the Lightwood's party" She finished.

"Magnus Bane helped _you_ escape from the Lightwood's party" he corrected averting his gaze back to the scone once he realized she was not going to betray his secret. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised he left me and helped you. Downworlders have to stick together right?" Not only did his blatant lie take Tessa aback, something in the scathing way in which he said Downworlders made hers entire body convulse with rage. Magnus had been nothing but kind to the Shadowhunters of the institute, and most of all to Will. Tessa wanted nothing more than to throw her mug of hot tea directly at his face. Maybe that would finally take the smirk off of it. But she thought better of it; this was the first time Tessa had lost her composure amongst Will's onslaught of insults. He knew how much her heritage had bothered her, and being labeled as a Downworlder, when in reality, she had no idea what she was, only made the issue more sensitive.

Nate had told her that her mother was a Shadowhunter, and her father a demon. But that was impossible. The offspring of this unholy combination were always stillborn. No exceptions. But she had the magnificent ability to flawlessly transform herself into others, while occupying both their memories and feelings; a power which no Downworlder or Shadowhunter could ever dream of possessing. Tessa wanted nothing more than to know what she was, and why Mortmain wanted her. Will knew this, and yet he continued to prey upon her insecurities. One day Will had told her he loved her, and the very next he berated her with insults. Tessa knew why, of course; he wanted to completely remove any feelings he had for her, and for the most part, Tessa welcomed his onslaught of criticisms. She would be a married woman within the year, and also wanted to be rid of any attraction she had towards Will.

"I'm not a downworlder," she said almost dejectedly.

"You better hope you aren't" replied Cecily "Or else you'll have to call off your engagement"

"What?" asked Tessa, almost choking on her tea.

"The council will never let you marry Jem if they think you are incapable of producing a line of Shadowhunters," Said Will matter-of-factly without looking directly at her "Downworlders are barren, as you'll remember."

She couldn't let them see the absolute desolation she felt. While she still had feelings for Will, over the past few weeks since the announcement of their engagement, Tessa's love for Jem had only grown. Although she wanted to scream at Will, to tell him how horrible he made her feel, with both his insults and the looks of complete desire that he still let slip, she didn't. _No, I will be the model of propriety_ she thought. So, she stood from the table, bid both the Herondales and good morning, and left the dinning room. All the while soaking in the hatred she felt towards him; allowing it to mask any other emotions. And so she stormed down the hall, searching aimlessly for her room.

In her room Tessa thought about Jem. She could picture herself enjoying their lives together at the institute. Never did she image that there would be a problems in the processes of getting married. She loved Jem, and Jem most certainly loved her. Had he known? Did he understand that the Council would have to approve of their marriage before he proposed to her? Did he think they were going to allow it? She needed to talk to him. She needed him to tell her that everything was going to be okay; that the one good thing in her life was going to happen.

She pried herself from the bed, straightening her hair and her dress and walked across the hall to Jem.

Will had spent five years perfecting his stand-offish and insulting manner. But why did it hurt so much more to treat Tessa this way now? He knew he had found love with Jem, Charlotte, Henry and now Cecily. But, why wasn't that enough to be happy? He stared gloomily at his partly eaten scone.

"Will?" Cecily said, interrupting his reverie "What's wrong? You don't look good, were you out again last night?"

Cecily was all Will could ever ask for in a sister. She was kind, loving, supportive, and genuinely concerned about his well-being; although Will did give her a lot to be concerned about. He had taken to his usual habit of wandering the streets of London and not returning home until the morning. He didn't sleep much, because he knew he would only dream of Tessa. It was no wonder Cecily was so concerned about him. Will was sure his father had done same thing while drinking, whoring, and gambling the family's money away. He didn't want to hurt her, but he needed something to take his mind off the pain. But Will ignored her question nonetheless: he did not want to lie to her again.

"You need to be nicer to Tessa." He said.

"But you-"

"I know what I do," he interrupted "but this situation is between Tessa and I. Has she ever done anything to offend you?"

"No."

"Then you should treat her with as much respect as you treat everyone else in the institute. I know how much you care for me Cecily, and I really appreciate your support, but this is my business." The younger girl did not reply. She looked slightly hurt, although Will knew that she would follow his suggestion. Will did not want to ruin Tessa's life; he only wanted to squelch his own feelings. He knew treating her this way was selfish, but he had to do it in order to protect his _parabati_. Jem was always in the back of his mind. Although some part of Will, the part that he never wanted others to see, wanted the Council to deny Jem and Tessa's engagement. He knew it would not change his need to distance himself from her. Jem would love Tessa regardless of what the Council decision and would find a way to be with her. So Will would go on pretending to hate her, until, hopefully, his feelings would dissipate: until he was free.

While he was brooding, Charlotte and Henry both entered the dining room looking as though neither of them had gotten sleep either. "Well don't you two look chipper this morning?" Will said sarcastically.

"Not today Will" Charlotte replied. "We received a letter from the Silent Brothers last night. They were able to retrieve something from Jessimine's memories, but the effort of overcoming the barriers in her mind have made her quite ill." She began chewing on her bottom lip, as if she was hesitant to say anymore "They're not sure she's going to make it."

The table was silent. Will desperately wanted to know what the silent brothers had uncovered, but knew better not to ask; Charlotte would tell them when she was ready. Charlotte looked like she had been crying all night. She had requested the Silent Brothers help in retrieving Jessamine's memories. It was also with her help that Jessamine's husband was killed. Jessamine was like a daughter to Charlotte, as was every Shadowhunter who took up residence in the institute. Although the girl was shallow, materialistic, and had betrayed the Shadowhunters, Will knew that Charlotte still loved the girl. She even had a special place in Will's heart. They had spent the last five years together, and Will had come to think of her as an almost insufferable sister. Although Cecily had not known Jessamin, Will had filled her in on all of the information about Mortmain, and she looked as eager as he felt to hear what the Silent Brother's had uncovered.

"They discovered the address of the Nate and Jessamine's meeting place, an Opium den in Whitechapel." She said quietly, as if she wanted to protect the girl's already damaged reputation.

"Whitechapel," Cicley replied "Isn't that where the girl was murdered a fortnight ago?"

"They found another body a few days back" said Will solemnly, "By the Angel, what was she thinking going into Whitechapel by herself?" They had found two bodies in Whitechapel within the last month. The details of their murder were gruesome. Both women had been stabbed to death, their bodies mutilated, and missing organs. Will shuddered to think that Jessamine had been in Whitechapel when the murders took place.

"I don't know," Charlotte replied staring down at the table and shaking her head "but now we have a lead on Mortmain's whereabouts. Will, I want you and Jem to investigate the location. Neither of you have the looks of an Opium addict, and as far as I can tell the place has no connection to downworlders, so you'll have to pose as mundanes collecting a debt from an addict that frequents the place." Will marveled at Charlotte's ability to take control of this situation after hearing such devastating news. All of the council members who thought women were too emotional to head the institute obviously had never seen Charlotte in action.

"We'll start making preparations immediately, although I don't suppose we could bring some Opium back? You know, for science. " Will replied, anxious to start the investigation.

"There's one more thing," Charlotte replied with a sigh, ignoring his last comment "By no means will you mention this mission to Tessa. I do not want any of the women to go to Whitechapel while girls are being murdered, and once Tessa gets wind of this she'll want to go. I have full confidence that you and Jem would be able to protect her, but I can't run the risk of you three being separated." Charlotte said most authoritatively. Will nodded and made his way down the hall to Jem.

Tessa knocked quietly on Jem's door, it was still early and she did not want to wake him. Although he had been feeling better in general as of late, Tessa noticed he was coughing more than usual, and hoped that it was just a cold. Jem took slightly longer reaching the door than usual, and when he opened it, Tessa could see why. He look pale, paler than usual. He had dark circles around his almond shaped eyes and it looked as though he was sweating profusely. He gave her a half-hearted smile, but it did nothing to mask his condition.

"Jem!" Tessa exclaimed "What happened? Do I need to call Charlotte? Are you feeling ill? Did you run out?"

"Tessa," Jem said in a soothing voice while placing his hand on her shoulder "Calm down, I'm fine. Come in, and I'll explain." He stepped aside to let her in, and she entered his room hesitantly.

"I'm so sorry you had to see me like this Tessa, I made a mistake, but everything is fine" he said reassuringly. He led her to a chair next to his wardrobe and gestured for her to sit. She took the seat hesitantly, perched on the edge while she waited for him to explain "Last night, I thought, because I've been feeling so well lately, that I would attempt to take a lesser dose of the drug."

"Jem that's reckless. If you –"Tessa Began before Jem interrupted her politely.

"I thought that since Mortmain is still buying a huge supply of it that I would try to lower my dosage, but as you can see, it didn't work." He said as he took a seat opposite of her on the trunk at the end of his bed. He could tell she was still concerned so he went on. "Don't worry, I took the appropriate amount this morning and should be feeling completely better tomorrow." She knew he was going to be okay, but in this state he looked so fragile, like the smallest whisper could send him toppling to the ground.

"So, Tessa to what do I owe this lovely visit?"

She wanted to ask him about the council, but she couldn't bring herself to mention anything that might upset his already frail condition.

"I just wanted to see you" she lied.

His face brightened at this. When Jem smiled it seemed as if the whole world were a better place. Happiness radiated from him so that others around him, regardless of their mood, felt uncontrollably happier. The smiles he gave Tessa were even more radiant. Even in his deteriorated condition, he truly was beautiful, like a swan taking flight. He did not have Will's ruggedly handsome beauty, but when one looked at Jem one could see his loveliness, both inside and out. _His smile could melt a girl's heart_, thought Tessa. She wanted nothing more than to kiss his pale lips. But soon they would be husband and wife, and there would be plenty of time for kisses _And more passionate activities_, thought Tessa unable to control the blush creeping up her neck to her cheeks. The night they had retrieved Will from the opium den still lingered in Tessa's mind. Thoughts of the way he attentively explored her body with his hands and lips served to increase the blush.

As if Jem knew what she was thinking, he stood from his seat and moved to her faster than Tessa would have imagined. He placed his hands on the arms of the chair, his smile now gone and replaced with a look of desire, and leaned down to kiss her. He broke away for an instant; his mouth still millimeters from her own "You're absolutely breathtaking when you blush," he whispered. She closed the distance again. She shouldn't be kissing him like this, he was sick, and where was her sense of propriety? But she couldn't help herself. He drew her from her chair without pulling his mouth away, wrapped one arm around her waist, and pulled her face closer with the other hand. The kiss was mesmerizing. Unlike the kiss they shared after retrieving Will, which was demanding and later turned exploratory, this kiss was filled with passion. It was as if he wanted to show all the love he had for Tessa in this one, incredible kiss. One hand was entangled in her hair loosening the pins that held it up, while the moved up to rest on the skin exposed on her shoulder.

She wanted to feel his skin as well, which was hot from the fever, like their previous tryst. She moved her hands to the collar of his shirtsleeves and began unbuttoning, while his hand on her back began playing with the laces holding together her bodice. He was so pale, so beautifully white; his skin so soft against her light touches.

She had just undone the last button of his shirt, only taking in his beauty for a second when someone knocked unceremoniously on Jem's door. They pulled apart immediately, like an electric current had just formed between them. Jem began hastily buttoning his shirt, while Tessa tried desperately to put her hairpin back in place. It would be terribly embarrassing if someone had suspected their passionate meetings, when even touching someone who is not a spouse might ruin one's reputation for life. Tessa shouldn't even be in Jem's room without an adult, let alone sneaking passionate kisses.

Jem had just buttoned the last of his shirt when the knock came again, this time much more forcefully. It was probably just Charlotte or Henry checking on Jem after he hadn't shown up for breakfast. If it was either of the two they would see that Jem was sick, but fine and leave before they would even notice Tessa. But when she heard his voice outside of Jem's door, she knew there was no escape.

"Hey open up. I'm not Ali Baba you know. I can't just say Open Sesame and the door will-"

At that moment Jem hurriedly unlocked and opened the door so that Tessa was still hidden from view.

"It worked! How would you like to go to the East Indies and see if we can use that little trick to find Shangri-La?" He said while pushing the door open farther, he hadn't noticed Tessa standing in the corner, he was still inspecting Jem. "You look like you got into a fight with a Werewolf, are you feeling okay?"

"I'm fine" Jem replied shakily "I just didn't take enough last night"

"You should be more careful" he said more seriously this time while striding farther into the room, his eyes finally leaving Jem. "If you keep trying to lower the dosage-"He stopped mid-sentence when he saw Tessa. He blinked as if he wasn't sure she was really there. Suddenly Tessa became very aware of how much her hair had come undone and how bedraggled Jem still looked. It was obvious what they had been doing.

"Hello Will." She said guiltily.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Hey everyone, I'm so glad you guys are like this story! I know it's taken me a long time to update, but to make it up to you guys I've posted** TWO** chapters! My intent was to have them as only one, but they were both so long that I had to split it up. I really want to thank all of my reviewers for being amazing, and for helping me out. You guys really make me want to keep writing! And please, any feedback is great, positive or negative!

So, without further ado, Chapter Two!

He stared at her for a long time, as if he hadn't understood how far Tessa and Jem's relationship had progressed until now. Engagements were a serious business, but many people hadn't even touched their betrothed until the wedding night. Will still held hope that the Council would deny their engagement, and perhaps their feelings would trickle away once they both realized neither could gain from the relationship. Will had never imagined that Tessa and Jem's feelings for each other had anything to do with physical attraction. He hated himself for thinking it, but Will had never pictured Jem as a man that women desired. The fact that Tessa and Jem lusted after one another meant that their relationship was much more profound than Will had originally assumed. This revelation hurt. The hope that their relationship was fleeting was the only thing that Will held onto. But, perhaps this was a good thing; perhaps now he could completely let go of his feelings, now that he knew that he had no chance of being with her.

He thought of the kiss he had shared with Tessa at the Lightwood's party; the way her skin felt against his calloused hands; the sensation that all he wanted to do for the rest of his life was kiss her, hold her, protect her. Did Jem feel that way? Did Tessa feel that way for him? _Of course she does_, he thought to himself, _that's the way people feel when they're in love, not when they're under the influence of warlock powder at a party full of demons. How was I ever so stupid to believe I had a chance with her_? He had treated Tessa horribly ever since she arrived at the institute. But Jem, Jem couldn't be cruel to anyone. That was his nature, it's why Will chose him as a _parabati_, because although Will acted spiteful, Jem could see through it. Somehow, Jem knew that Will was not a terrible as he let others believe. Jem brought out the best in Will, as he brought out the best in everyone. Of course Tessa would choose Jem over Will.

He tore himself away from Tessa's gray eyes, and turned back to Jem.

"Miss Gray, if you wouldn't mind, I must speak to James about a private matter," he said curtly.

"Oh, oh of course" said Tessa, as if she had just snapped out of a reverie of her own, "I have training that I must get ready for at any rate"

She walked towards Jem who still held the door open awkwardly and placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder "If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask." Jem looked into her eyes and gave her a small smile. Will averted his gaze from the two to the floor. When he heard Jem close the door he turned back toward the pale youth.

"I'm sorry you had to see that," Jem said while scratching the back of his head uncomfortably "We haven't done anything too inappropriate"

"It's fine" said Will brusquely, wanting to talk about anything else. Jem seem to take the hint and moved to the trunk at the foot of his bed. "So, what is it you wanted to talk to me about" he asked taking a seat.

Will smiled at Jem putting all thoughts of Tessa behind him and ready to finally discuss his plan for tonight "We have a lead on Mortmain's whereabouts."

* * *

><p>During training, Tessa's mind often wandered. When both Lightwoods were coaching Sophie and Tessa, she never had the opportunity to think during training, but now that Gideon was the only teacher for three pupils, of which Tessa was the most advanced, she had time to think. However, today her thoughts were unwelcome. She didn't want to think about today; not about the Council, Jem's illness, Will's insults, or the look of complete dejection he gave her once he realized what she and Jem had been doing. All she wanted to do was hit something, but Gideon was too busy showing Cecily how to properly hold a whip. Cecily was not wrong when she told Will that she was doing much better in training than either Sophie or Tessa, but she was miserable with the whip, which seemed to please Sophie, who had taken remarkably to the surprisingly deadly weapon. Sophie looked just as anxious as Tessa felt to keep her mind off of unwanted thoughts. The maid, who was practicing her own skills with a whip, often glanced at Gideon and Cecily. Tessa knew Sophie worried that the two had somehow developed feelings for each other. Tessa couldn't see it, but wondered how she would feel if Jem were to touch another girl like that.<p>

"Spar with me?" Tessa asked the scarred girl, who was staring worriedly at the two across the room while half-heartedly cracking her whip at a straw dummy.

"Oh yes, please" she said gratefully.

Tessa chose her favorite weapon from the rack: a 30 inch blunt small sword. Although Sophie would have used the whip in real combat, it was far too dangerous to use while training, so she chose a blunted saber and both girls took their places on either side of the combat ring. Tessa took the first swing. Sophie was able to dodge and block Tessa's thrusts easily. _This is exactly what I need,_ thought Tessa while swinging her sword at the smaller girl. She found that when she practiced with Sophie, everything seemed to drift away. Her past, Nate, Jem, Will, Mortmain; everything else was overshadowed by the ringing of swords as they crashed together melodiously. Tessa knew that Sophie felt the same way. The two girls had been staying late after Gideon and Cecily finished training, in order to practice with each other. It was quite a bonding experience. Although Sophie had harbored negative feelings towards Tessa in the past because of her confusing relationship with Jem, her own feelings for Gideon and the fact that Tessa and Jem were now engaged seemed to reverse any disapproval the maid had.

While Tessa had the advantage over Sophie in both height and weight, the smaller girl was much faster. She dodged and blocked with ease, but Tessa knew that if she took the defensive, she would claim the advantage. But she didn't want the fight to end just yet, so she continued hacking away at Sophie's sword. She knew the tactic that Sophie was using. She was trying to wear Tessa out, to the point that she couldn't think straight, and her attacks would become progressively more careless. This is how Sophie had won their last match. But Tessa wasn't going to let that happen. Tessa stepped back and made the smaller girl come to her. She blocked each blow; but Sophie proved to be faster. She aimed a low attack and then immediately pulled into a higher one that hit Tessa on the shoulder.

Although the blades were blunted, one, nevertheless, had to be careful; they could still draw blood, which is exactly what Sophie's blade had done. The blow ripped through Tessa's Shadowhunter gear and sliced open four inch gash in her arm. She let out an exclamation of pain, but prepared herself for another attack. When Sophie saw the blood, she dropped her saber with a loud clatter and brought her hands to her mouth.

"Nice hit, Sophie!" said Gideon. He and Cicely had stopped their own training to watch the match.

"Oh Tessa, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you." Sophie said quietly.

When Tessa saw that Sophie was not going to attack again, she let out a little laugh and brought her hand to her arm. She had hardly felt the strike. It wasn't a deep wound, but she was sure Sophie felt terrible. Tessa knew that each time Sophie landed a blow, the small girl felt like she was betraying her oath; it was her job to take care of the residents of the Institute, not to hurt them.

"It's fine Sophie, it doesn't even hurt," she laughed. But Sophie looked doubtful. The wound was bleeding quite profusely.

"Come with me and we'll get you cleaned up and bandaged," she said turning towards the door to the infirmary. Tessa followed, holding her bleeding shoulder.

In the infirmary, Sophie began collecting gauze and other items she would need to bandage the wound while apologizing over and over again to Tessa.

"I'm so sorry Miss," she said, which, by Tessa's count, was about Sophie's fifteenth apology. "I didn't think the blade would cut through the armor and everything. I will talk to Gideon about making them blunter."

"Don't worry," said Tessa reassuringly while Sophie gingerly began cleaning her arm. "It's a small scratch."

"I'll make it up to you somehow Miss" she said "How would you like me to try a new hairstyle on you tonight? I've been thinking a lot about it, and it would look beautiful on you."

"That sounds wonderful Sophie," Tessa said "but you really don't have to."

"Yes I do," Sophie replied "Plus I want to, it's going to be a really quite night here with half the institute gone."

"What?" Tessa said looking at her questioningly. She hadn't heard a word about anyone leaving the institute, let alone multiple people as Sophie had suggested.

Tessa knew Sophie regretted saying anything the moment the words were out of her mouth. "Who's leaving?"

"Charlotte is going to the Silent Brothers to see Jessamine," said Sophie, hoping that would appease Tessa's curiosity.

"And who else is leaving?" asked Tessa impatiently.

"Begging you pardon Miss, I wasn't supposed to say anything, Miss Charlotte said not to," Sophie backtracked.

"It's not Jem is it Sophie? He's sick he can't go anywhere tonight." Sophie gave Tessa and apologetic look, and Tessa knew exactly what was going on.

"They found out information about Mortmain," Tess stated "and they don't want me to know because I'll just get in the way." She thought about Nate's death and shuddered involuntarily.

"No that's not it at all Miss –"

"I'm going with them" Tessa interrupted, not hearing Sophie "Mortmain wants me, and I need to find out why." with that, Tessa pulled the sleeve of her Shadowhunter uniform over her now bandaged cut and stormed out of the infirmary. For the second time today, Tessa stomped down the hallway in fury. She couldn't believe they hadn't told her. If Charlotte had any information concerning Mortmain, Tessa should have been the first person to kknow. But instead, she told Jem, and Will, neither of whom even bothered to mention it to her. They were planning on investigating while she was completely unaware of the situation. She was most angry with Will. He saw Jem; he knew that her fiancée should not leave the institute in his present condition. And she was angry at Jem, for not telling her. She knew Will would have lied to her anyway, but she trusted Jem completely. So she tore down the hallway towards his room.

She was so furious she didn't bother knocking. She slammed open the door to Jem's room, and immediately regretted the decision. Will and Jem had been changing when she decided to throw the door unceremoniously open. Both boys were shirtless. She had seen them both in this state before, but separately. She locked eyes with Will and her face turned as red as a beet. She turned her back on the two boys and lifted her hands to her blushing cheeks.

"I'm so sorry" she said uncomfortably. She did not want to start this conversation by apologizing. They had both kept valuable information from her; they should be on their knees begging her for forgiveness, not the other way around. But as always, Will found a way to make the situation even more uncomfortable.

"If you wanted to see us naked Tessa, you could have just asked" Will said sardonically while pulling his shirt over his head.

Jem gave him disapproving look and glance back over at Tessa "You can turn around now Tess" Jem said, and when she did, she could tell he had been blushing as well, while Will leaned against the windowpane; the picture of nonchalance. "What is it Tess? Are you okay?" Jem asked politely giving a passing glance the bloodstain on her arm. All of a sudden her forgotten anger boiled anew.

"How could you not tell me?" she asked Jem sternly, her finger nails digging into her palms "You had information on Mortmain and you didn't tell me!"

"Tessa," Jem replied calmly, "We were under strict orders from Charlotte not to tell you. We're going to an opium den in Whitechapel, where those girls have been murdered. She was only looking after you."

With these words her anger began to dissipate. She knew Charlotte cared about her like a daughter, but she couldn't forgive the fact that she had information about Mortmain and didn't tell her. Charlotte knew how important Mortmain's case was to Tessa. She wouldn't even be at the institute if it weren't for that monster. And Nate would still be alive. And Tessa couldn't stand the thought that someone else could be harmed by attempting to help her.

"You're not going" she said to Jem authoritatively, "You're sick, what if you have to defend yourself?" Jem looked at her wistfully, as if she were a dog pawing at her master's feet.

"I have to Tessa," he replied "I'm doing this for you." She wanted to scream at him. She wanted to tell him that she didn't need his help that she was completely capable of taking care of herself. Her training had given her a new sense of confidence. She could fight, and she could fight well. She had powers that no one else in the world could even dream of having. She didn't need him to be her white knight. But she knew that he cared for her. He wasn't doing this because he thought she was incapable of doing it herself. He loved her and didn't want to see her hurt. But she wanted the same for him.

"I'll take your place" she said resolutely.

"Tessa, we can't let you go to Whitechapel, not with women still being murdered" he said.

"Well isn't it fortunate that I won't be going into Whitechapel as a woman." She said flashing him a mischievous smile.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Alright everyone, this was by far, my favorite chapter to write! I really hope you guys enjoy it!

Chapter 3!

Charlotte had already left to visit Jessamine when Tessa and Will set out for Whitechapel. Tessa was quite glad that they would not have to stage an elaborate escape plan to get Tessa out of the institute without Charlotte noticing. Their plan to retrieve information about Mortmain was already flimsy enough without adding the extra effort of escaping from the institute.

Tessa was not looking forward to the prospect of spending time alone with Will, and he had made it very clear to both Tessa and Jem, that he was not excited about being with Tessa either. They would have to share a cramped carriage together, and investigating together surely meant that they would have to share a conversation, which also meant that she would be the subject of numerous insults. She almost wished that she had agreed to let Sophie do her hair tonight; the girl time would be much appreciated after this mission.

For the second time in a month Tessa was dressed as a man. The person who she would be changing into once they arrived at the opium den was a man the Sisters had forced her to transform into during her captivity. She knew this was risky. There was a chance that Mortmain knew, or perhaps even had killed this person, and if anyone at the opium den had connections to Mortmain, they could recognize her. Tessa toyed with the idea of transforming into Jem, but quickly disregarded that thought. Changing into Jem was a much more intimate experience than one might imagine. For all intents and purposes, she would be Jem. She would know how he would react in any situation, his past, and his thoughts. She was not ready to know every single detail about Jem's life. The clothes she was wearing were set aside for any Shadowhunter who stayed at the institute who might find himself in need. The person she was going to transform into was much shorter than Will or Jem, and even shorter than Tessa. The sleeves and pants of the suite were inches too short for her, and the vest hugged her bust in a quite unflattering manner, which all added to how uncomfortable she felt being alone in a carriage with Will.

It was the first time she had been alone with him since he had told her about the demon's curse and had confessed his feelings for her. She had a hundred questions for him about everything, but would never dare ask. She wanted to keep as much distance from him as possible, and knew he felt the same. Their ride to Whitechapel was silent, save the clopping of horse hooves on the cobblestone. They were both staring out of opposite windows, but when they entered the seeder part of London they were forced to close the curtains.

For the first time today, Tessa was left to her own unwelcomed thoughts. Her mind wandered to Jem, waiting for them back at the institute. He probably wouldn't be able to get any rest, but Tessa knew that it was much better than being out on the chilly London streets. It had taken an ample amount of convincing before Jem would even think about letting Tessa go to Whitechapel. Will had kept silent for most of the conversation, but it was only when he promised he would never let Tessa stray from his side that Jem finally conceded, and even then he forced the two to go over the plan at least ten times. They were to disguise themselves as bar owners coming to collect money that Nate owed them. It made Tessa sick to use Nate's name in such a fashion. She knew Nate had gotten himself entangled into nasty business, but she wanted to think of her brother or cousin or whatever he was as she had before all the mess began, not as the greedy and malicious person who aligned himself with her enemy and apparently frequented opium dens. But she knew that if she wanted to get any information about Mortmain, she had to do this.

She wondered what they would tell Charlotte when they returned. Would they tell her that Tessa had gone to Whitechapel, or lie to her and say that it was Jem? Jem would most certainly want to keep Tessa out of trouble, but if they found anything they would have to present the information to the Council. Thoughts of the Council led Tessa mind to wander to engagement. She regretted not talking to Jem earlier today. She needed more information and did not know when she would get the chance to ask him.

"About what you said this morning concerning the Council" Tessa said interrupting the silence that filled the carriage, "what did you mean when you said they wouldn't let Jem and I marry?"

Will didn't so much as look at Tessa when he answered. "It's simple, one of the Council's duties is to ensure the well being of all Shadowhunters, the most important of which is the continuation of our species. If your union will not produce a Shadowhunter, they will not allow you to marry." He said it so coldly that Tessa wanted to cry. He didn't show the slightest amount of sympathy when he delivered this heartbreaking news.

"But with is condition . . ." she pleaded on the verge of tears.

"It's true, they might grant him this one wish because of his illness, but the Council has never allowed a marriage between a warlock and a Shadowhunter, ever"

"But I might not be a warlock,"

"True, but I think the Council would rather label you as a Downworlder, than as something they can't identify. As Benedict Lightwood has demonstrated, the council members don't like to be proven wrong." The way he delivered the lines as if he knew exactly what Tessa was going to ask, led her to believe that he had been thinking about this as much as she had. Did he want the council to deny their engagement? Did he think it would mean that her love for Jem would die? In that moment, she hated him. She could not fathom how someone could be so selfish. Was he treating her like this because he truly was angry at her for being with Jem? She had thought it was because he wanted to distance himself from her. But if he was treating her this way out of spite, that was unforgivable. Only a monster, a demon would be as selfish as treat her horribly because she had spurned him.

They traveled the rest of the way in silence. It wasn't long until their carriage came to a stop. Outside they could hear the laughter and shouting. Before they exited, Tessa closed her eyes and slipped into her new skin. When she looked back up, Will was watching her. She had watched herself change in a mirror on various occasions, and it was quite a remarkable thing to witness. It didn't happen all of a sudden: her nose grew larger and her hair shorter in a matter of seconds. She knew the man she was changing into by heart; she was now several inches shorter and far more round, with a large forehead and front teeth that protruded over her bottom lip.. The man was no beauty, but it was better that no one noticed her, and he was the most average looking person she could transform into. His name came to her immediately: Isaac

The two exited the carriage and made their way to towards a decrepit looking building. They could hear music and laughter coming from across the street. The pubs would be full of people this time of night. But no sounds came from the building that Tessa and Will were headed for. Ragged black curtains hung from every widow, giving the appearance that the place was abandoned. Will approached the front door and knocked three times. The man who answered was the most hideous person Tessa had ever seen. His hair hung lank on his balding head, he was missing an eye and most of his teeth and he smelled as though he hadn't bathed in months. He studied them carefully with his lone eye, and pulled his top lip up in a look of distaste.

"Good evening sir, we are looking for the owner of this fine establishment" Will said taking off his hat in a sign of respect.

"Ain't no sir here, the names Cater" the man replied with a think accent, "Wha' business you got?"

"We've come to collect a debt from one of your . . . patrons." The man nodded his head, as if he finally understood why these two well dressed men were knocking on the door of an opium den.

"You'd be wantin' ter talk ter Chapman I reckon. Come on then." He said motioning for the two to enter. Will went in first and Tessa followed. While some of the horrible smell was emanating from Cater, as they walked farther down the dark hallway Tessa realized that most of it was coming from inside the building. It smelled like sweat, vomit, but there was a hint of something sweet mingling with the horrible smell. They could hear moans from some of the rooms they passed, and maniacal laughter from others. Tessa tensed with fear. She didn't like this place. While the Downworlder outpost they rescued Will from had been quite seedy, this place reeked of something sinister. Tessa knew what Opium could do to people. Many great men had lost their reputation, family and even their lives to the horrible drug. She couldn't imagine Nate frequenting the place, and could not even fathom why Jessamine would meet him here.

Cater led them upstairs to a door at the back of the building. He gave the door a sharp knock.

"What is it." Growled a man's voice from inside

"Debt collectors again" replied Cater.

"Send them in" the voice sighed

Cater opened the door and motioned for them to enter. Sitting at an expensive looking desk was the fattest man Tessa had ever seen. He was dressed in only a silk red robe and was staring intently at a piece of paper in front of him, holding a monocle up to his eye. Tessa had only seen two other men in such an immodest state, but she did not feel completely disgusted then as she did now. In addition to being grotesquely obese, he was also the hairiest man Tessa had ever seen, a fact that he seemed very proud of. Stacks of gold, paper, and half-eaten food littered the desk. As she looked around the room Tessa almost overlooked the scantily clad young woman sprawled out on a heap of pillows in the corner of the room. She was skinny and looked slightly disheveled. A prostitute, thought Tessa. Her eyes followed Tessa and Will hungry as they entered the room. Two large black dogs lay by the fire, their eyes also seemed to pursue the new comers. Cater stepped back into the hallway and closed the door after them. When he heard the door click shut, the man, who Cater called Chapman, looked up from his reading and stared intently at the two in front of him.

"You look a little young to be debt collectors" he remarked. _He knows,_ Tessa thought. But his tone was not suspicious; it didn't sound like he doubted their authenticity, he was only commenting on their appearance.

"Take a seat please." He motioned for them to sit in the two chairs facing the desk, and Will and Tessa moved to take them.

"Thank you for your gracious hospitality" Will said with a flourish of his hand "my name is Lucas Wesley and this is my associate Victor Luther. As you've already been informed, we're here to collect a debt that one of your regular patrons has accumulated. He borrowed a sum of money from our associate and we have yet to see a dime. We assume he spent most of it at your establishment." Chapman flashed them a smile.

"Yes there are some men who just can't seem to have enough. But I'm not in the business of telling them when to stop. Now, before I help you, I'll have you know that I charge 10% of whatever you're able to weasel out of my customers." He said leaning back as his chair gave a moan under his weight "God knows they've probably already spent it all."

"10% is a reasonable amount," Will replied and the man smirked at him

"Who is it that you're looking for?" Chapman asked

"A man named Nathaniel Gray." Will said, and it took all the willpower Tessa had not to shudder at the name "We heard that he used to come here often with a young lady. He owes us quite a bit of money, so I assure you, you're 10% will be worth any information you can give us."

Chapman's smile dropped slightly upon hearing Nate's name. Now Tessa was sure something was amiss. The atmosphere in the room seemed to change completely. The dogs also seemed to sense the sudden shift and began to lift themselves from the floor. Chapman sat up straight as his chair let out another groan.

"Liza, why don't you see if our patrons need anything." he said to the girl on the bed, his eyes never leaving Will and Tessa. The girl pulled herself from the bed, not bothering to pull her short dress down as she went and rushed barefoot out the door. When the door was closed Chapman began again.

"Now, we all know you two have not come here to collect a debt." Tessa tensed and glanced over at Will who looked unfazed. Chapman, seeing Will's calm demeanor, smirked and continued "I don't know who you two are, or what you're after, but you're playing a dangerous game."

"And what game would that be?" Will asked smugly.

The fat man rose from his chair and began pacing back and forth behind his desk. The two dogs padded towards their master. "If you're asking questions about Nathaniel Gray here, I'd imagine you know the kind of people you're dealing with. Now my advice Lucas, is to leave this place, and stop asking questions before you get yourself into something you can't handle"

"Oh I assure you, I won't have a problem" Will said arrogantly. Chapman stopped pacing and turned slowly towards Will.

"And what make you so smug, as to think you could take on someone as powerful as me?" Will smirked at the man.

"It's not you I want. What do you know about Mortmain?" Will asked almost yelling at the man.

Without hesitation, Chapman lurched across the desk and grabbed Will by the throat. Papers and coins that littered the desk flew in every direction. Tessa yelped in a most ungentlemanly manner and brought her hands to her face. The dogs began snarling and barking at Will. Chapman's face was red with rage as he dug his nails deeper into Will's neck. But Will still had the small smirk on his lips. "Listen here, you little brat." Chapman growled. "I should kill you for even saying that name here." His hand seemed to relax slightly as he said "But I have orders; Just know, I'm being very generous in sparing your life." He threw Will out of his chair and pulled himself off the desk. Tessa moved to help Will.

Turning towards the fire and sweeping back his greasy hair Chapman yelled "Cater!" the one-eyed man entered the room once more "please show our guests out, and inform them that if I hear them asking anymore questions, next time, I wont be so merciful" Will pulled himself from the floor snarling and Tessa placed her hands lightly on his chest, silently telling him that it was enough. Will looked down at her and turned sharply for the door.

Cater led them out the way they had come. Walking down the hallway again, Tessa could still hear the moans and laughter coming from the rooms, and she felt sick to her stomach. What did Chapman know about Mortmain? Why was he so angry when Will mentioned his name? Was it anger at the fact that Will knew something? Or was Chapman's anger directed at Mortmain? Everything was so confusing. When they reached the front entrance Cater opened the door for them.

"Ye' two best be mindin' yer own business. Next time Chapman'll gut ye' and fed ye' ter his dogs." He slammed the door behind them. Tessa moved to inspect Will's neck, which had already begun to bruise. She was about to chastise him for being so stupid as to mention Mortmain's name during reconnaissance, when they heard a woman's voice from behind them.

"You're looking for Nathaniel Gray?" Tessa spun around to see the Liza, the woman who was in the room with Chapman. She was quite pretty, Tessa thought. Her curly light brown hair rested on her bare shoulders, and she had big light gray eyes.

"Yes," said Will pushing past Tessa towards the girl "do you know anything?"

"I may have some information you might find interesting" the girl said straightening the bonnet on her head. She was shaking, and whether it was from the cold cobblestone under her bare feet or from fear, Tessa could not say. "Meet me at the pub across the way in an hour, and I'll tell you what I know"

The pub was crowded when they entered an hour after their encounter with Liza, and was barren after they had waited another two for her to arrive. Will had tipped the barman generously in order to secure a secluded table and again to keep the bar open an extra hour. Will was on his third tankard of beer, and was starting to get angry.

"Maybe she was too afraid to come." Tessa proposed the effort of keeping up her appearance as a man was beginning to wear on her, and all she wanted was to return to the institute. "You saw how frightened she looked. I would be too if I worked for someone like Chapman."

"She was our last hope of getting any solid information about Mortmain." Will said stubbornly as he stared into his almost empty cup. "We have nothing to go off of now."

"Sorry fellas," the barman had approached their table and he looked as anxious to leave as Will and Tessa "I gotta' be closing up soon, the wife's waitin'"

"Come on. We might as well head back" Will said after draining his tankard and setting a couple of coins on the table.

The two left the bar and headed down the deserted street towards their carriage. Tessa, tired from the effort it took to maintain her appearance, decided that it was acceptable to changing back. She had become Tessa once more when they heard the scream. It was a woman's scream; high pitched and calling for help. Will looked in the direction it came from and took off running. "Stay there!" he yelled back at Tessa. But there was no way she was going to stay behind alone, so she ran after him. Her top hat, which was now far too big for her small head flew off and she had to stop to collect it.

Will had turned the corner a couple of streets down and when Tessa finally caught up to him she saw that a crowed had gathered around something she couldn't yet see. She saw Will standing amongst the people dressed in their nightgowns and walked towards him. He turned in her direction with a pained expression on his face. When he saw that Tessa had indeed followed him, his eyes widened. He rushed towards her and placed his hands on her shoulders attempting to block her view. His eyes were wide, begging her to turn around.

"Don't look Tess" he pleaded.

"What is it?" she asked. She was tall enough to see over his shoulders and the space he left in the crowed was still wide open. She froze when she saw what the crowed had gathered around. It was a body in a large pool of blood; a woman's body. She looked like she had been attacked by an animal. Her throat and abdomen had been slit open. Organs were spilling out of her middle. Her dead eyes were wide open in fear. Blood stained her brown hair red. Her short black dress had been hiked up and torn away at her breasts, leaving her exposed to the onlookers. Tessa had the sudden urge to rush over and cover her. She wanted to yell at the crowed to stop looking at the poor dead girl. But her legs felt weak, and Will was holding her back.

Tessa turned away from the grisly scene, Will still gripping her shoulders. Her legs gave out and she fell to her knees on the cobblestone and vomited.


End file.
